I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
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