I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Randomize
