whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
