My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Randomize
