You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
