i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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