I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize