i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
