I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I lost the right to judge tonight
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize