If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Hippo gnu deer
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Still dying that you shit outside
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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