What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
it's like iHOP with fire
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize