just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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