if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
