He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
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