I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Holy sore nipples Batman
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
