If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
