No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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