hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
