you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
