Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I could fuck to npr.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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