I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
