Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
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