why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
