Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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