If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
operation have a gay friend backfired
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
