i jhust puked up my retainher.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
