Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
