I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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