My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
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