We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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