I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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