in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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