Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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