Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
