If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
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