you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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