i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
So squirting runs in the family.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
