they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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