Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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