life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I wish i was in the wii world.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize