we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Randomize