Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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