i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize
