This is not my ceiling
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize