As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
