i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize