it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Randomize
