five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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