hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
