Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
