my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Randomize
