I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
where are you?
Hypothermia
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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